Girl Talk Thursday this week is all about bitching and getting it all out and I can appreciate this topic, only because I pretty much bitch all the time. Not sure why I bitch that much, seeing it doesn’t seem to be very effective. Regardless, bitching is good for the soul – it’s just not healthy to keep it all in, people! I’ll try to keep the list short (which means a lot of editing on my part).
- I hate my queen size bed because it is too small because I share it with a total bed hog who he steals all the blankets and claims 90% of the bed, leaving me basically hanging off the edge. Plus, the minute I get out of the bed, he always hugs my pillow, and it smells like his armpit the next night. Which leads me to my next point:
- I hate guy B.O. – Seriously, the husband could bathe 10 times a day, yet he still smells like a sweaty guy. (And not hot Colin Firth sweaty, just the regular skeevy kind of sweaty – not hot).
- I’m tired of cleaning up man pee and boy pee off the floor and every inch of the toilet.
- I wish dust bunnies would just kill themselves already.
- Laundry can break even the strongest of Martha Stewart spirits. Damn you dirty skivvies.
- I hate the fact that the love of my life, DIET COKE, now regularly makes me sick every time I drink it. I don’t want to break up with you my love!
- I’m over the snow, slush, mud, and cold weather. I want the warmer weather to get here already, so I can bitch about how hot it is all the time.
- I’m tired of my son coming home from school EVERY DAY smelling like a dirty, wet dog. GROSS.
- I’m tired of seeing that scary trailer for The Crazies every time I’m home alone. I’m a wimp with an over-active imagination!! Not a good thing.
- I wish I could kick my hormones’ ASS into submission already. I created two human beings dammit – why must I still suffer the after effects years later???
Bitch Session over. For now. Try it – release it! Feel free to bitch in your comments! You’ll feel SO much better.
{ 33 comments… read them below or add one }
OMG. This is fan-freaking-tastic. You might be my new best online friend. or at the very least, the subject of my newest online stalkathon. Thanks I needed a laugh tonight.
Bradie
I’m right there with you on so many! When we bought a new bed, we planned on downsizing to a queen. We laid on the floor models, with me getting smacked in the head with an elbow every time Hubs got into his regular sleeping position. We asked the salesman if there was a queen out we could try “All of these are queens” he replied. So we stuck with the king despite the tiny bedroom. I generally leave the MB toilet to Hubs, but I’m in the early stages of potty training my youngest and only boy. I hate sharing bathrooms with other people and I HATE cleaning bathrooms that others use.
My youngest is 31 months and I’m just now beginning to see relief from hormone induced problems. Are you on birth control? Because they can mess you up too. Which in my case, the effects of that lasted several years after I stopped, until after I had my first child. The problems just changed with the different hormones! ACK!
I had to stop by, because one, you’ve been #1 the past two roll calls on Sits, and two, I’m so tired of snow I can’t stand it.
You said skeevy in your post. That is why I love you. Well a whole bunch of other reasons too…but right now, it’s totally the skeevy.
My bitch fest started first thing this morning with my usual…go downstairs, & know EXACTLY where the Penis Head made his lunch for work an hour earlier due to the typical pile of bread crumbs & remnants of whatever else he made himself before he went on his merry way & left the frikkin mess for me to wipe up! Sigh! And all FOUR of my rug rats come home smelling like wet dog, not just the boy….can’t WAIT for this crud to go away (far less laundry & nasty ass skivvies in the summer too, when they live in their bathing suits LOL!)….winter blah blah blah, & did I mention, BLAH!! As for the hormones….holy crap, mine get worse by the month & I’m now 2 years out of breastfeeding/pregnancy, after 11 years straight of various baby hormones. BRUTAL!
As always Maria, thnx for sharing & giving us a chance to vent!!
Cranky Sarah, I posted my toilet training 101 today on my site, it has a few tips for the boy/seat thing!! No one in my house leaves the seat up or misses…THANK GOD, since 4 of us are girlies LOL! Good luck!!
Thanks for this, because I reaaaaallly need to bitch right now. And yes, bitching always makes it better.
Now, I love company and seeing friends and family, but not when it is a constant revolving door, like I’m the local Holiday Inn! Most of my relatives, (inordinately large family) reside in Chicago. I am in Florida. February is the meanest month in that fair city and so…to Florida they all flock.
I have had a steady stream of company for the last 3 weeks and for the next 3 weeks. On top of it, we’re having our floors redone in our bedroom and closet and so the rest of the house looks like Sanford and Son with furniture and clothes everywhere. This weekend was supposed to be my breather. No company and a chance to put my feet up and relax. We just got a phone call this morning, cousins are on their way to my house for a surprise visit. I’m about to put up a NO VACANCY sign on the door!
*Sigh* Okay, I feel better now.
Oh and yeah, all your bitches? Spot on. And what IS with how dirty men are? My husband likes to occasionally take a bath in MY tub. My tub is for bubbles and reading and a glass of wine. My baths are not to get clean. I make him take a shower first, if he wants to hop into my tub. Somehow, he still leaves a layer of grime in my tub. I don’t understand. They must be born with dirt caked into their skin. It’s the only explanation.
Okay, done hijacking your blog. Thanks for the bitch. It helped.
Pee on and around the toilets? I am there with you! I hate cleaning that up!
I agree. With pretty much all of them.
My smelly husband takes his socks off and leaves them on the floor–wherever–all the freaking time, and it drives me up the dang wall! I can’t take it!
OK I have a queen sized bed too and I have to say hubby does fairly well of keeping tohis side. And he doesn’t have the sweat thing going on either woohooo SCORE.. BUT he does leave his socks all over the house BOOO.
I have a carpeted bathroom so I have to shampoo my carpet once a month thanks to the 3 boys.. UGHH I hate it.
Bitching IS good for the soul! LOL
That’s right, get it out and then get on with more fun things!
My current bitch has to do with people not RSVPing to the wedding shower I’m hosting tomorrow afternoon. Just HOW in the hell am I supposed to know how many Belgian chocolate shells I need to fill the favors if 80% of the guest list can’t be bothered to pick up a freaking phone or type a freaking email to let me know they’re coming. Not to mention the rentals, the food and the games I need to prep for.
Granted, if I have extra chocolates it’s not like they’re going to go to waste… but still!!!!
I totally feel like Emily and her Chocolate Boxes from that one episode of Gilmore Girls (for those who used to watch).
(just stopped by from SITS!)
I’m sick of the globs of toothpaste in the sink, ewwwww
stopping by from SITS
“I’m tired of cleaning up man pee and boy pee off the floor and every inch of the toilet.”
Right there with you, Sister.
I guess there was something in the air – as today I opened up the confessional booth for venting just like this – over on my blog…
Stoppin in from SITS.
my husband strips down to his underwear when he comes home. I’m never sure where I’m going to find his clothing.
Damn it girl! You stole my bitch list!!
Love it..
OMG. I swear I’m changing the Pants on the Ground song to Pee on the Ground. I find it everywhere – on the sides of the toilet, on the floor, on the side of the vanity, right under the toilet paper roll thingy. Worse? Wondering whether the brown smear on the bathroom wall is 1) chocolate 2) dirt 3) poop. Thanks for letting me bitch!
don’t think i have anything to add here
happy sits saturday sharefest…
LOL — Unfortunately a larger bed doesn’t help. I have a king size and still wake dangling off the edge several times a week. Sometimes I get up and try going over to his side of the bed, the side he has already abandoned, and it always ends up with him waking me up to tell me that I’m on his side of the bed!!
(Visiting via SITS Saturday Sharefest… really enjoyed my stop here!
Kathy over at Everyday Bliss)
http://www.blisspot.blogspot.com/
SNOW…I too am SOOOOOOOOO incredibly sick and tired of it – yet I know that it is not unusual to get an April snow storm (Cleveland, Oh). ARGH!
Ugh, I sleep with a bed hog too – who complains that I take up too much space? PFFT!
It was snowing this morning – AGAIN – when I woke up this morning. Enough is enough already! Stores are starting to put out spring stuff and apparently mother nature hasn’t gotten the memo!
Pee makes me sick…man and little boy pee. Forget cleaning it. Try sitting in it. A wet butt because some man or little boy didn’t aim straight, and didn’t wipe it off. I’m now angry.
Hugs and Mocha,
Stesha
Ugh. I hate pee on the toilet and floor too. It’s disgusting.
Ha ha… the sweaty armpit thing made me laugh… albeit sympathetically of course! OK… my bitch is also a toilet related one (I’m sorry – I have a bass side, what can I say?). Every time I clean the toilet, you can bet your bile duct that either OH or SC will come along and err.. how can I put this… leave their mark! Fine people… leave your mark but please just clean it after!!! Anyhoo… lets talk about shoes and stuff now….
OMG are you the right blog to find today! i have 3 little ones, and my husband…that means every week it is literally 10+ loads of laundry, cleaning 5 bedrooms, sorting and folding and putting away all the clothes, cleaning the 1 bathroom and 1 potty – full of pee spots everywhere!!!!!!!!!! and then the house…I also own a small bed, but hunny you got it good with a Queen, I have a double bed, and my husband takes it all away, the kids come in the room and then I am left squeeezing my ass cheeks together to clench the edge of my matress just to stay on every night!
whew…that felt great!! can I come again?
just dropping by from sits, Happy Sharefest!!!
Danon
come by and check out my blogs, both are a hoot and i love the “f-bomb” and other such things that mommys shouldn’t! (alcohol, swearing, making fun, quiet time)
http://www.instaiblehost.blogspot.com
http://www.pantypyramid.blogspot.com
I <3 you … that is all. Carry on with the most awesome bitching!
Right there with you on some:
Laundry is just ridiculous, 10 loads a week is just insane right now.
And the hormones, I have the acne of a 13 year old girl and I am 31!!! Really???
And the scary movie previews when home alone, at night, and then the attic door wiggles a little. Ugh.
Holy hell where to start…..
*stupid people (esp when I have to work with em)
*Iowa (scares the hell outta me and apparently whomever made that new movie “Crazies”
*Women who bitch they only get a couple hundred bucks in child support–bitch please. Be grateful
*Ungrateful ppl
*Periods. Fuck that, I refuse to participate in that dirty sport called menstrating
*Most men in general
*smart cars….wtf?!
Well I hope you’re happy lady…now you got me all fired up! THANKS!!!
OMG, these are awesome. Are we married to the same man? I have to hug the edge of the bed every night too, but I got smart and we have our own blankets now. No more chilly, edge of the bed sleeps for me!! He’s totally a pillow thief too. Except he scrunches and smooshes and basically ruins the shapes of pillows. And yes, he leaves the BO on the pillows too..that or his FEET. What’s up with that? Don’t even get me started on the towel stealing. Anyway, thanks for the read, even if this wasn’t your most current, I found it excellent. I stopped in through SITS, and I’ll be coming around a lot.
speaking of boy pee…i hate it! and we only have one boy in our house…my husband. he was outta town this weekend and guess what? magically there was NO smell of pee in the bathrooms. and yet he swears he doesn’t do that. pft.
Stopping over from SITS
I agree, bitching is good for the soul. And why do boys/men pee everywhere?? I mean really, I’m amazed at the places I am cleaning pee off of in my bathroom.
We just upgraded to a King sized bed about a month ago when we moved – and it was the BEST purchase we’ve ever made. I swear!!!
I’m sooooo in the mood to bitch right now. I hate the weather, sick of the cold, sick of dieting AND not losing Squatdiddly! sooo sick of school and tired of dealing with the patients in our office,,,I have no patience for our patients.
visiting from SITS
Visiting from SITS. Look on the bright side- you could have just a full-size bed like me! But you’re right on, a good bitch session now and then is great!
I need a bitch and whine day too. It’s 100% healthy! I should try it sometimes LOL
@MaricrisG