Thirty-eight years ago, I was born with a baby scowl on my baby face. But then, you would be scowly too if you were born as a floating head. Seriously, don’t I look like the most jaded baby ever? A small baby I was not. But I worked the one piece knit outfit like nobody’s [...]
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Sexy sexy time Gilbert Gottfried style.
Anatomy of a Jumbo Freezie.
Hilariously brilliant.
(via Jeff Hamada)
I am a Mother, and the captain of our funny little ship. With two young kids and a third constantly being contemplated, I am the queen of accumulating piles and stepping on Legos. I am a night owl, who is forever exhausted. I am a perfectionist, who has perfected the art of procrastination. I am forever trying to get back to my cute, young self, and am a genius at failing at it. I am a great wife, and an even better friend. If you can make me laugh, I may follow you around for awhile. If you know Colin Firth, I’m moving in. Also, I am easily bribed with a strong latte, so keep that in your back pocket.
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