Mar
18

Things That Need To Be Invented ASAP

by MARIA on March 18, 2013

I’m sitting here trying to convince myself to deal with the laundry. And then I thought, hey if only I had paid attention during math and science, (turns out we really do need that crap), I could have invented something to do it for me. Actually, I would invent many things.

  1. Laundry that puts itself away. Obviously.
  2. Starbucks Delivery with 24 hrs/day availability.
  3. Along the same vein – Caffeine IVs. #pun intended
  4. The invisible punch – for those you want to punch from afar and without consequence.
  5. Cute pets that eat dust bunnies to survive.
  6. Ice cream that doesn’t melt.
  7. Dogs that don’t poop.
  8. Dog poop that cannot be stepped on.
  9. The elusive money tree.
  10. The pillow that is always cold – no need to ever flip it over.
  11. Doctors that see you on time.
  12. Instant lobotomies – for those who need instant lobotomies.
  13. The Cardigan Club – A new cardigan at your door, every month. Seriously, this one could ACTUALLY happen.
  14. The Man Cold Bubble for when the man has a cold and you just don’t want to deal with that shit.
  15. Sons of Anarchy in 3D, but only when Jax is on screen, and only if he’s shirtless/pantless/all of the above.

What am I missing?

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{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Chantal March 18, 2013 at 12:20 pm

A pet that eats dust bunnies, now that is a pet I would be willing to get. And I haven’t watched SOA yet but thanks to that photo I think I have to start. Like NOW!

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2 MARIA March 18, 2013 at 12:22 pm

Oh Chantal, watch it if only for the Jax character. Also prepare yourself for massive amounts of blood and violence – also, you get to see Jax’s ass. WIN

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3 Sandy March 18, 2013 at 12:22 pm

I don’t know what you’re missing at the moment…but I love the pet that survives on dust bunnies. THIS IS PURE GENIUS!!!

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4 MARIA March 18, 2013 at 12:27 pm

Right? I think this might be a moneymaker Sandy!!

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5 Kathy March 18, 2013 at 12:28 pm

They sell #10 at Costco, the Comfort Revolution Hydraluxe pillow. :)

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6 MARIA March 18, 2013 at 12:29 pm

Seriously? I’m all over it!

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7 Kathy March 18, 2013 at 12:33 pm

Yeah Bill has one. Only thing is it smells funky at first and it literally weighs 20 lbs. Excellent for pillow fights where the goal is to knock someone one permanently.

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8 MARIA March 18, 2013 at 12:35 pm

Ahahahaha. Ok, now I’m definitely getting it. One way to stop the husband from snoring – knock him out, literally.

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